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Girl Scouts Thief Gets $85K

Woman Steals $85,000 From Girl Scouts Of Gulfcoast Florida

Think the Girl Scouts aren’t doing well for themselves? We submit to you exhibit A, Stephanie Person, or as she’s about to be known — the piece o’shit that stole $85,000 from Girl Scouts of Gulfcoast Florida. While it’s understandable to be angry at a Person like this one, let’s pause for a moment and appreciate the fact that the Girl Scouts were able to raise that much money to begin with. That’s a lot of snickerdoodles.

But yeah, you’ve got to be an irredeemable ass to steal from little girls. Gotta give her credit for how she went about it, though. According to WWSB, which obtained a report from the Sarasota County Sheriff’s Office, Person used an inactive troop account to transfer the money to herself. She would “prepare a batch summary report which would show the name, troop ID, amount and to what account the money was being transferred into,” the site stated. “She would then manually change the account number for some of the troop accounts. The deposited funds from that troop would be rerouted to the inactive troop account.”

We keep saying it, Florida … if only you could use your powers for good!