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Teens Smear Animal Feces

Florida Teens Shit-Bomb Their Friend With Animal Feces, Duct Tape

Gainesville’s own Nikki Rowena Sismanidis, 18, and Jasmine Marie Suarez, 19, sure don’t look like the types to get crazy with the fecal matter, but looks can be deceiving.

The Gainesville Sun reports that the girls — still teenagers, but too old to be treated as such by courts of law — broke into the home of what the paper calls “an acquaintance” and vandalized the “acquaintance’s” bedroom with duct tape and animal poo. Aw, let’s cut the bullshit, newspaper people. We’ve all got acquaintances. We don’t typically cover where they sleep in excrement. Let’s use the word “enemy” here. The person’s cardinal sin: they didn’t respond immediately to texts from the pair, who wanted to hang out the previous day. (That escalated quickly.)

The girls were briefly taken to the Alachua County Jail, but are now free. Lock your doors and pick up after your pets, Florida. You never know when they’ll strike again.